Sonic and Angry Birds

Sonic, Red, Chuck, and Matilda.

Angry Birds is the eighth episode of Season 2 and the twenty-first episode on Sonic For Hire.


Angry Birds are cross-breeds.


  • Mario: Thank you for sending Toad to the underworld. You're a little bit closer to paying off your debt, which by the way, IS HUGE.
  • Sonic: Yeah I seem to have an act for murder, plus I got a little something from his bird girlfriend if you know what I mean, Wink Wink?
  • Mario: Uh, I'm not a 100% on this but, that thing may have being, a dude at one point.
  • Sonic: Eh Whatever I'm a busy man I can't be constily checking for penises. So what's the next job?
  • Mario: OK, what I need from you-wait a minute, who's too busy to check for a penis?
  • Sonic: This guy I got places to go and penises not to check so let's move this along.
  • Mario: Alright whatever look, there's a certain group of pissed-off birds that got'n a little too popular lately, I want them gone.
  • Sonic: No probemo, Mario Batali. (leaves)
  • Mario: (Annoyed, but calm) That's not my name.
  • Sonic: (cuts to the Angry Birds game; Sonic arrives, exited and talks sarcastically) What's up guys? Killing pigs, Huh? Sounds like fun!
  • Chuck: (The birds talk to him sarcastically and bitterly, like they have heared about him somewhere) HO HO! shit! It's that stupid hedgehog guy!
  • Red: Hey look at my spiky hair and attitude, I'm so fucking extreme
  • Matilda: What?! You come here, trying to mooch off our success, old man?!
  • Sonic: NOOO, i'm just a huge FAN, I love any game that extends my time on the shitter by ten hours! Say, do you guys want some gum? (throws the birds gum)
  • Chuck: Mmhmhmm! For a washed up loser you know some good gum. what kind is this?
  • Sonic: Oh I'm glad you like it! It's my own recipe, mostly Alka-Seltzer and rice. Enjoy it. It's gonna explode your stomaches. (the Birds throw up and finally die) All right time to fry up some bacon and eggs. (runs, runs back and picks up Matilda) Ohh I think I'm gonna throw some chicken in there too and make myself a kick-ass omlet! (runs away holding Matilda away)